Because He's Batman
by The Delphian
Summary: With that, the three women turned their attention back to their previous object of fixation. It was with narrowed eyes that The Flash decided to execute a more precise scoping of the heroes' line of sight. After doing so, he found that it was… No. It couldn't be. Why, it was none other than The Batman that the women found to be so fascinating!


**A/N: Just a quick little one-shot I had been meaning to get out of my head. Hope ya'll enjoy! **

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The stars were shining just a tad bit brighter beyond the poly-fiber windows of the Justice League's watchtower; for it was simply one of those days. One of those days where, no matter what planet was threatening to blow up the other, The League continued to have an overwhelming level of confidence and the utmost positive of attitudes. It was on these days that every mission seemed to run smoother, every bad guy appeared much weaker, and every victory tasted particularly sweeter.

Mr. Wally West was, without a doubt, embracing the vibes of this special day. The Scarlet Speedster had just been beamed back up to the watchtower from a more than successful mission and was currently swaggering his way on up to the monitor room. It was there where he found The Batman leaned back in a sofa-chair, his eyes darting back and forth among the various monitors, as well as a few tables full of his various teammates. One table, the one closest to Mr. Wayne, was occupied by several beautiful ladies of The League. Naturally, being the flirtatious hero he was, The Flash found himself making a speedy dash on over to their table in order to engage in some conversation.

"_Hello_, Ladies." He greeted. The traction padding beneath his boots caused him to come to a screeching halt before them. He placed both of his hands down on the table, leaning down towards them before throwing them a charming, or, at least what _he _thought was charming, wink. "Miss me?"

The speedster couldn't help but notice that his arrival had ceased their previous fit of giggles; he was uncertain, however, why this was.

"Oh," Said Stargirl whilst cranking her neck in order to peer directly past the hero, "Hey, Flash."

Wally allowed his face to contort into a confused expression as he made a quick scan of the area to see what in the room could possibly be any more interesting than _him_. I mean, after all, he _was_ the fastest man alive.

"What were you all laughing about just then?" He asked. Having found nothing in the room that could possibly be of greater interest than him, he sat himself in the single remaining seat at their table.

The three women turned to look at each other with school girl expressions before breaking out into another fit of giggles.

"Oh, nothing…" Said Stargirl, picking out a strand of her blonde hair in order to begin weaving it between her fingers.

"Yeah," Added Ice, "don't worry about it…"

Now becoming a bit flustered, Flash gave all three heroines a skeptical look.

"Come _on_!" He whined, "I can keep a secret."

The three laughed again; only this time it was simply due to the inaccuracy of the man's statement.

"Really, Wally," Said Fire, her thick accent entwined within her words, "It's nothing for you to worry about."

With that, the three women turned their attention back to their previous object of fixation. It was with narrowed eyes that The Flash decided to execute a more precise scoping of the heroes' line of sight. After doing so, he found that it was…

No. It _**couldn't**_ be.

Why, it was none other than The Batman that the women found to be so fascinating!

Wally winced at the sound of yet _another_ eruption of childish laughter that came from the women. Quite irritated, he shot up from his seat and zipped on over to where Mr. Wayne remained stationed; with his arms folded across his chest, he leaned back against the slanted control panel in order to face the man and direct to him a vengeful glare.

"Flash." Batman greeted flatly.

"_Batman_." Snapped The Flash.

A few moments of silence passed and, every so often, Bruce would glance out of the corner of his eye to see if Wally was still there. After seeing that the same irritated expression lay on the man's face after his fourth glance, Bruce concluded that he wasn't leaving any time soon. The Dark Knight sighed.

"What's wrong, Wally?" Bruce asked; the agitation in his voice was impossible to ignore, yet his eyes remained on the screens in front of him.

"What's wrong?" Responded Flash, "Oh, I'll _tell_ you what's wrong…"

Bruce raised an eyebrow beneath his cowl and looked towards the man out of the corners of his eyes.

"Yes, that _would _be what I asked of you…" Bruce confirmed.

Flash's eyes grew even narrower.

"You think you're just_ so_ smart, don't you?" Flash accused, leaning down to jab a finger into the seated man's armored chest.

Bruce looked down to where Flash had assaulted him before nonchalantly removing the man's hand from his suit.

"I doubt my opinion on my own intelligence has anything to do with why you're upset." Bruce reasoned before turning his attention back to the screens.

"Oh, yeah?" Said Flash, "Well _their_ opinions _do _upset me!"

Batman turned to follow where it was exactly that The Flash was now pointing. Once he saw that it was the table of heroines he was gesturing to, realization struck him. This realization, however, was by no means illustrated in his expression.

"Oh," He said, turning back to the screens, "them."

Flash's eyes widened in disbelief; he had to put great effort in preventing his jaw from dropping to the floor. His growing feelings of detest for the man only accelerated in their progression as he watched him take a casual sip of tea out of the mug that rested in the cup holder of his chair.

"Oh?" Wally repeated, "That's all you have to say? Just, _oh!?_"

Batman didn't even bother to remove his eyes from the screens this time.

"What more is there to say?" Bruce asked before setting down his cup.

Flash gave an exasperated huff, "I just don't get it; you already have an Amazonian _Princess_ for Hera's sake! What _more_ do you _need?_"

Bruce frowned.

"Diana and I have no romantic relations with one another."

Flash rolled his eyes.

"Oh _please_, and Green Lantern's eyes aren't green!" Flash countered.

"They aren't," agreed Bruce, "they're naturally brown; it's his ring's energy that causes them to appear green."

"You're missing the point!" Flash snapped, "Just_ please_, tell me; _how_ do you do it?"

Batman sighed, "Do _what_, Wally?"

"Make them like you!" Flash cried; the poor man's face was no more than the epitome of desperate.

"I don't _do_ anything to try and make them like me; in fact, if anything, I actively try to make them _dislike_ me." Bruce explained, "They just… follow me around all the time."

Sensing the sincereity in his tone, Wally sighed and decided to accept this explanation. The Scarlet Speedster retook his leaning position back against the slanted panel, refolding his arms across his chest.

"I'm sorry, Wally," Continued Bruce, reaching, once again, for his mug of tea, "but I have no advice for you."

The Flash nodded solemnly and watched as the Dark Knight took another drink from his cup; only, this time, Bruce's face contorted in disgust.

"_Blech!_" He cried, "It's too cold, now."

Wally raised an eyebrow, "Want me to go run and heat it up for you?"

Before Bruce could even accept Wally's offer, however, Fire had managed to saunter her way on over towards the two heroes. Without even giving Flash a single glance, she came up behind the bat, draped one arm over his shoulders, and brought the other underneath the bottom of the mug that was grasped firmly within his hand. With a graceful click of her finger, a green flame ignited below the mug, heating the brown liquid to a perfect temperature in no more than fifteen seconds. After removing her hand from beneath the mug, she took an unnecessary amount of time blowing out the flame above her finger with a rather suggestive pursing of her lips.

"Thank you, Beatriz." Bruce said softly with an instinctive, suave smirk brushing across his lips.

"Any time." Fire responded with a not-so-subtle wink before placing a gentle good-bye kiss upon The Batman's cheek.

It was a Brazilian custom, in case you weren't aware…

It wasn't until Fire had walked away that Bruce was left to make unbearably awkward eye-contact with Wally; who, by now, was seething with rage where he stood.

"She was just…warming my tea…" Bruce explained, pointing to the mug as though to present it as proof.

Flash only continued to glare at the man.

"I really, _really_ hate you…"

Bruce frowned.

"Why?" He asked.

Flash sighed, "Because you're Batman."

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**A/N: Is there anything that man **_**CAN'T**_** do? Please review.**


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